This whole day has been a blur. I’m not entirely sure how I
got here. I have spent my entire life doing the right things like supporting my
family, working long hard hours on the job, and going to church every Sunday.
Even with all this, I managed to lose it all. Now I am in the one place that I
never thought I would be, a jail cell.
A small town jail cell that looks nothing like what we see
on television. They never talk about the smell on Barney Miller. This stale
moist smell as if someone barely cleaned the urine from the floor. I just stare
at this stone floor because I don’t want to look up. I don’t want to see the
other people who may be here. These are the people I thought I would never be
in the room with, much less sharing a prison.
I cannot help the tears from my eyes. I lost everything that
defines me and all I was trying to do was stay one step ahead of this marriage. Marcia! I can’t event think about what has
happen between us. As much as I try to bury my head in between my hands, I will
never be able to hide from myself.
All I wanted to do was to get rid of this house! This
god-forsaken house that we bought 5 years ago thinking that it could be our
summer cottage, when in reality, it became the bane of my existence. A virtual
money pit that seemed to turn my marriage upside down, I only blame myself for
all of this. It was my idea to buy it. I wanted to have a place that Marcia and
I can spend time away from everything and everyone.
It was no secret that our marriage was in trouble even then.
I thought that the incredible amounts of
money I brought home every paycheck would have kept her happy. I was a true
company guy. When there was a conference to go to, I was there. When clients
needed to be entertained, I was the one to make sure they were taken care of. I
was good at my job and I loved every minute of it. But, I knew that I was
barely home and she missed me (or so I thought).
This house was my solution to our marriage. I figured we
could spend quality time together and reinvigorate the passion we once had. I
thought she would be surprised when I told her I bought it, but something
didn’t sit well with me about her reaction. I thought she would be happy but
she complained about the money and not including her in the decision. Hide
sight being 20/20, she was right. Had I knew then what I know now, I would have
realized that my marriage was already over.
I knew the house was going to be something that needed to be
fixed. I thought we could do that as a family. Andrew, my dear son (I can only
imagine what he thinks of me now), would have helped us. But, things just fell apart just about a year
after I bought that house. I lost my job. The company I worked for was one of
those places that people love to talk about. When ‘we’ received a bailout, it
didn’t mean ‘me’ or ‘us’. I was laid off like thousands of people.
I could not find a job and had two mortgages. Marcia, who
was a stay at home mother, could not stand my presence. Always agitated that I
didn’t have a job and the money we saved was evaporating quickly. The house
would always be brought up and became a wedge between us. I didn’t tell her
that I knew the real reason she was angry with me being home all the time. I
found out a week after I got laid off that she was fucking my co-worker, Jeff. I woke up late one morning while she was out
on her run. She left her phone on the kitchen table. I had no intention on
looking through her phone but when she got a text message, out of habit I just
looked at the screen. He texted her about possibly meeting that weekend, I was
stunned.
I looked through rest of her messages hoping and praying I
was wrong. There were hundreds of messages, dirty messages. I felt numb. Maybe
it was the depression of losing my job but I simply left to work on that house.
I had this idea that I would spend the rest of what we had to fix it up. I
worked on the house everyday and she hated me for it. I did look for a job when
she wasn’t around, I would send resumes out as often as I could. I had a few
interviews here and there, but it turns out they were not hiring a man in his
mid 40’s with tons of experience.
I spent four years fixing that house to what I wanted it to
be. I replaced the roof. I rebuilt the chimney and replaced all the windows. I
installed a brand new furnace and redid that entire kitchen myself. All the
while, my beautiful wife of fourteen years was committing adultery. This was
going to be the house I lived in. I was going to leave her when I was ready,
when I finally got a job. Of course she had no problem finding a job.
Sure, we had many fights during these past few years but we
decided to stay together for Andrew’s sake. He is a freshman at Syracuse
University and we didn’t want him to worry about us. Thank god he is such a
smart kid. He was awarded a full academic scholarship. He is majoring in
Forensic Science.
Yesterday I found out I got a job. Nothing spectacular, but
it is a second chance. I would be able to finally handle things and eventually
start the divorce process. I went to that house to install some light fixtures
in the living room when I saw it, a small earring on the futon. She had been
there! I left a spare set of keys with Andrew but he is away at college. She
must have gotten them from his room. Why would she be here?
I was so angry. I will not let her take this way from me! I
cannot have her screwing this man in my house. I worked too hard for this. So,
I plotted to do the only thing I could do.
I walked out onto the deck and grabbed the bottle of lighter
fluid that I used for the brand new charcoal grill I bought. I sprayed lighter
fluid everywhere. I was not going to let this woman do this to me. I am not going
to live in another place where she has fucked her lover. I just had this house
appraised and I will just collect the insurance on it. I empty the bottle and jump into my car. I
have every intention on lighting this house in the morning while she on her
morning run.
The drive is a good 40 minutes coming and going. I wipe the
bottle clean and put in the trunk of her car. She will get blamed for arson and
I will be free of her. Divorce will be an easy thing after that.
I woke up early this morning from my peaceful slumber on the
couch and I noticed that her car is gone. Today is Saturday and it is way too
early for Marcia to go for her run. There is a knock on the door. I open it and
there is the County Sheriff. “Mr. Stephens?” he asks. I nod my head and ask him
what is going on. “There has been a fire and I am afraid we found your wife…and
another gentlemen, dead”
The rest of today was a blur. I was arrested for suspicion
of Arson. They take me in for preliminary questioning. Where were you last night? I was home. Did you know your wife was committing Adultery? I had no idea,
officer! The fire department found traces
of lighter fluid all over the house, how do you suppose that got there? My
wife was jealous that I spent all my time and our money fixing up the house. I
have no idea how it got there. I just finished renovating it.
My day was spent answering question after question. It was pretty
much over for me. I begin to sob and say how I cannot believe my wife is dead
much less that she had a lover! The tears were real, but my words weren’t. This
was the first time I admitted to myself that Marcia really did not love me.
But, now what? I’m not even sure how the fire started!
So, now I sit here waiting for my fate. I never asked for a
lawyer because, technically, I really didn’t set that fire. I hear the jail
cell open. “Mr. Stephens, you are free to go. The evidence shows that your wife
died trying to set the fire. We found that a cigarette was the initial cause of
the blaze. Did your wife smoke?”
Marcia was never a smoker and neither was Jeff. “Yes, my
wife smoked. It was a nasty habit.” I walk out of that jailhouse knowing that I
have lied for the final time.
The only person I know who smoked, was Andrew.
1 comment:
Do you have more of these short stories? It feels like I am reading about real characters. I like that I could get to know them in such a short story. Well done!
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