Farewell @SyracuseSCPS Speech

Here is the transcript from my speech earlier today. Video to follow later:

Everything happens for a reason. I believe that I have a connection with everyone in this room. In one way or another you, have all been a part of my success over the last 11 years. Whether you have been a friend, a mentor, a mentee, a supervisor, an employee, or just here for the food, I feel that I have shared a connection with every one of you. I have built relationships here that will last me for a long time.

Up until this morning I was not sure if I should prepare remarks or just wing it, but I finally came to the conclusion that I should write my thoughts down so I do not forget what I truly want to say. It has also not escaped me that for the first time in 11 years I can say pretty say much whatever I want and not have to explain my actions to Bridget later. (smile)

Most of you know that I moved up here after the events of 9/11. I came up here feeling a sense of purpose because when I left Syracuse in 1998, I ended up bouncing around job to job without really having that sense of purpose. The only thing I knew when I was first hired was that I missed working in the Schine Student Center. It was the best job I had when I was a student. Now I am going back home with a career and attainable goals that SU has developed.

Clearly, you all can go without the history lesson but I started working here when I was a freshman in 1992. I was the only freshman, in fact, working at the info desk at the time and I worked there for 4 years. I worked all the time to the point where all my friends (including Casey) used to tell me that one day I will end up running this place. Eek!

So here I am….all those years later leaving a place that I have come to love. I have come to admire and respect so many of you (excluding Dave Pennock) that this day is filled with mixed emotions. I look at the staff that I have been working with and I realize that I have a unique relationship with each one of them.

Ryan, who is not here because the state of Massachusetts has extradited him to return to Boston for jury duty, just joined this lovely band of misfits and we bonded the other day. He is getting the my furniture (including the bed) thus ensuring my legacy of never getting enough sleep and coming into work after 9am every day.

My relationship with Becky was always a great one. She used to watch Rocky for me and I appreciated that so much. I have enjoyed our conversations about life and will miss how sensible you can be. I guess I really do not have a joke for you but I am glad you made here on time. (smile)

Jen (sigh), I will miss the looks she gives me during the difficult times. When we are in staff meeting and I have to play my usual devil’s advocate role. I will miss the hair color changes and the simple question of “Why are you leaving here me with these people?”

I will miss Henoc and his singing. He has truly been a fantastic Graduate Assistant and I encourage all of you who don’t know him to get to know him. His charm and politeness will win anyone over…until he plays Adele for 14^th time in an hour. I will miss you buddy. 

Dave Pennock. What can I say about him? 

Moving on, Joe Goings! I have nicknamed him, Jolo. He and I have one of those relationships where we joke on just about everything…except the Chicago Bears. I enjoy his presence because not only does he laugh at all my jokes…he thinks every idea is worth doing! Gotta love that.

Dave Pennock should feel lucky I mentioned his name for the 3^rd and last time. He is an A-type personality who believes everything is black and white. The only gray he sees are the Yankees’ road uniforms. I will miss joking on you and with you. I will miss that your face gets so red (particularly your neck) when you are embarrassed. But seriously, we have always known how to just talk about things like baseball and sports to break the mood of a stressful day. But the most important thing I want to say is…Can I have my Inception blu ray back? I mean MY LAST DAY IS TOMORROW.

I met Scott Casanova in 1997. He had long flowing hair like a wookie. He has been a true friend when I needed one. He is my personal Boba Fett. Scott has driven all the way to Hancock, NY to get me when I had a car accident. He has helped me change a tire and fished out my parking card when it fell in between the stick shift in my car. He is the best white friend a person like me can have. I knew with him in the car, I will never get pulled over. I will truly miss Scott although he told me that once Monday comes around everything becomes my fault…

I left  Meghan a little bit later on this list because I want her to get all her tears out the way first. I can sit here and joke about her all day but she has truly been my right hand. She has seen me at my best and my worst and vice versa but I truly believe in her and in her abilities. I will miss you so very much and I have one word of advice: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE STOP DROPPING YOUR PHONES IN SEWERS.

Casey is my brother from another mother. I met in 1992 in summer institute (which is now Summer Start). We took writing 105 together and sat next to each other. That is where a 20 year friendship was born. It was Casey that called me back in 2001 to tell me I should apply for the Facility Supervisor position. I don’t have to say goodbye to you because A) I have the keys to your house, 2) We have a Values Academy presentation to plan and C) True friends never say good bye. That is why you are getting the obesity chair in my office…

Finally Bridget, this woman is the reason why I am the professional I am today. She has always allowed me to spread my wings and has given me the room to learn from my mistakes. I have no jokes for her because the staff will make sure to do that enough already. We have been through rough times and been the shoulders we needed to cry on but if there is one thing that has defined my relationship with her and how real she has been with me. It is something she said to me in 1993 when I was just promoted to the info desk manager, she looked at me said… “You need to make sure that when you hire students to work at the desk, that they are a reflection of the students who walk through our doors” I have always stayed true to that and made sure I was just as honest with my students. I love you, appreciate you, and will miss you.

Before I finish, l want to say that I miss my students and my student employees more than I will ever be willing to admit. They will be with me in my heart and let’s just face it, most of them live in New York and will probably take my open door policy way too seriously. I will miss Student Activities and FASA.  I will miss Debbie and her fabulous suits and Eddie with his fabulous shoes or was it the other way around? I want so say Thank You to Sylvia for really being positive and giving me great advice and I want to thank Colleen for just being Colleen. I also to paraphrase Dr. D (whom I will also miss) by sayin… “I am taking my magazine…and going home…”

For those I do not mention. This isn’t a goodbye…this a cya later. 

Thank you.

Saying Goodbye to an Old Friend

As I write this, I look down and see an empty floor. For the last few years I have had Rocky by my side. He has been the one living thing that has witnessed just about everything that has happened to me in the 21st Century. Now, Rocky is the last real sacrifice I have made before I leave Syracuse. He will stay here with the ex-wife to live out the rest of his days.

I cannot help but feel sad about this even though I know that I am doing the right thing. He will be much happier in Syracuse where there is more grass and trees. The chances are extremely high that he will be more spoiled than ever and I am ok with that. It was just heart breaking to say good bye to him. It is going to be weird to wake up every morning and not have to walk him. I am grateful that my days here are numbered because him not greeting me everyday when I open the door to my bedroom will be difficult.

Rocky is a reminder of where I have been. He was a puppy sleeping on my chest when I was going through my unemployment period in 2000. I remember the walks from Soundview to Castle Hill, in which, we crossed through the mall on White Plains Road in the Bronx. I also remember hugging him hard after I came home from 9/11.

He had such great resilience to survive that first drive to Syracuse. Rocky hates the snow but loved to dig his face in it. I remember how he loved the other dog, Rusty, and how sad he was when he died. Rocky has seen me at my worst during the divorce and he is seen me at my best when I sold the house. He could tell my moods and always found away to make me feel better. I repaid him by nursing him back to health when he was sick.

I have watched him grow old and lose his eye sight. Rocky is like an old man now with his old man ways. You have to carry him downstairs because he is afraid to fall. I almost do not remember life without having to cater to him. Yet, I would not have it any other way because I truly love that dog.

Saying goodbye was something I had to prepare for. He was originally supposed to come back home with me. But, things happen and situations change. Rocky will be in a better place and will still be loved. I will miss him more than than he will know. This is truly my last sacrifice. I feel know that I am coming back with nothing but the clothes on my back (and the comic books, dvds, PS3, and TV in the Car)...

10 Days

This is just crazy. I am excited to be starting a new chapter. I am sad to say the goodbyes that I know I have to say. I am scared to see what happens after all this done. I love the fact that everything is changing.

Mixed emotions is something that I am feeling at the moment. Everything that I have been fighting for is finally coming to fruition and I all I am thinking about is just closing the book on this place. I feel like I am living the last few episodes of a long running sitcom that has been on the air for 11 years. I get that familiar feeling when Cheers closed or when Theo graduated from college in the Cosby Show. You want to cry but that wouldn't be right because (even though it is a show) you know that life goes on.

In 10 days I will be home and I'm not really sure that people really understand what that means. I have been like a prodigal son in may ways. I left NYC with the idea that I would never come back. Being in my mid 20's trying to make it was difficult and I left because I couldn't succeed in my hometown. I had this delusion that I would stay in Syracuse and live the American Dream. There was always that pull for me to return home even though the relationship with my mother became worse before it ever got better. For all my failures at love and life, I achieved greater successes at many of the same things

Now, I coming back home with things being so different. My life is not the same as when I left. I feel smarter and wiser because I learned from past mistakes. I've learned how to forgive and I've learned how to sacrifice. Most importantly, I have learned how to love. I've grown to love myself and appreciate the world around me. I do love Syracuse and I will truly miss everyone that I have had so much contact with.

Before I started taking the things off my walls in my office, I kept thinking about the many students who have seen my office for what I hope it was…a place to feel welcome. The Puerto Rican flag, being the first thing that many students see, represents my commitment to all students about being proud of what I am and never being afraid to show it. I had to take pictures of it for prosperity. If I am lucky, I will have a similar set up at Barnard College.

As joyous as I can be about leaving, sometimes moving means making hard decisions. In many ways I want to start a new life or "volume" when I get back home. I find myself getting rid of things here and there and selling other stuff. However, the most difficult decision is to leave my dog, Rocky, here with my ex-wife. He does belong to her too and I know this is the right decision for him. He is getting older and needs a person who will love him and care for him in ways that I may not be able to. Out of all the things I have had to do during this transition, I will tell you, this is the hardest. It almost breaks my heart to have to say goodbye to Rocky…

But, like everything else, I will deal with that moment when it happens. My students mean the world to me as well and I hope they know that. I am just glad that everyone has been understanding that this is not really a goodbye, not this small world of email and Facebook. I will treat this more as a "see ya later."