Chaos

A room filled with clutter
I can see a mess
that needs to be picked up
and straighten out
to put order to chaos
leveling out the imperfect
and through it all I fight
the notion that I am
meant to be with someone
so instead of cleaning
I blend into the clutter
pretend that I do not stutter
in thought and words
I begin to wonder
can she see me through the disarray
am I recognizable in the confusion
that is reality?
My actions are nothing but a jumble
in this rummage I stumble
realizing that I need to clear the anarchy
but what can be done
but clean up the mess
clear out the room
then perhaps I can finally
see the floor
the path that leads out the door
before it closes
before I am trapped...again
in this room of unending chaos
where confusion leads
to laziness and self hatred
when all things that can be said
go unsaid
but instead
I am left with a room
cluttered with
pieces of the past
that plays like a puzzle
that cannot be swept
under a rug with a broom
I need to get out of this room!
I just have no clue
on where to start or what to do
but I will fix this
because I know what it is I miss
and that is you.