Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Judging Others


It has been a long month. I cannot begin to share how much I have had to go for each poem I posted last month. Everything I wrote was either about someone or something that has effected me over the last year. I told myself that I was not going force the writing of 30 poems unless I felt it. I was only able to come up with 21 and I am ok with that. I have shared so much of myself this passed month that is it almost difficult to go back to normal blog writing, but I feel that after a month I do have a few things to say.

I have come across some interesting things over the last month that has just struck a nerve with me. I have written about so many things since I started this blog, but I have barely touched the subject of judgmental people. This goes far beyond people who love to hate on others. This has to do with the fact that there are people in the world that feel the need to judge others on their actions. There is s distinct difference between  whether you think someone is wrong or and judging them for said actions. We can never walk in someone else's shoes.

There is that saying, people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, well the reason for that is because we are all human. I also noticed that those who judge the most are the ones who have made some of the biggest mistakes in their lives and usually refuse to acknowledge this or they just lie to themselves in general. The ability to judge someone suggests that one may feel they are better than someone else.

Often times, I will have people tell me about their problems and usually they ask me not to judge them. I almost have to laugh every time because I have said this more often than not: after everything I have done, I am in no position to judge anyone. I understand that mistakes are made. I understand that we have the tendency to follow our hearts with no regard of reason. I understand that it is so hard to let go of things. Why in the world would I judge anyone when I have made the same mistakes? It makes no sense to me, but I have seen people do this.

I have seen people judge me. I have seen people judge their friends. It is something that all of us have this capacity to do. We think that we have a higher moral code than others but who determines what that higher ground is? Do not get me wrong, I don't pretend to be this person that likes everyone because I do not. But, I base my likes and dislikes on their character. I don't think that we are all born to get along with everyone, but we are born with the ability to respect a person for who they are and not judge them for who we think they are.

This is a big deal to me because I know that there are people who shape their view of the world on other people's judgments. Some people will act a certain way to avoid judgmental opinions of their friends. Others will just adjust their lives due to fear of what people may say and sure maybe they just do not want to hear what others have to say, but at the end of the day, most people care about what other's think.

We live in society in which, if you are rich and famous, who get that fine microscope turned on you because everyone wants to know your business. We do this to each other on a smaller scale, but it is so very similar. It should not matter if someone is dating a person we like or not especially if we cannot get our own shit together. Most of us do not go to Law school and practice it in order to ware a robe that allows us to push a gavel and judge other for their crimes against society.

People judge others because they feel that if they were in the same situation they would do something different. The fact of the matter is, we would never know. If it is a matter of the heart, we can never know. We can only try to understand the hardships of that our friends and family go through. Judging people only makes you, the judge, look petty and immature and when it comes around to your turn to go through a hardship, just hope the eyes of judgmental do not fall on you.

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